1. prologue

2. GDC (interlude)

3. beginning

the prologue

JOB - dev blog #1

3/7/26

Let's start before the beginning.

JOB, as a concept, had been buzzing around in my head since I took Economics for Game Designers taught by the incomparable Alexander King. There, we learned to don our "systems glasses" to see the world as it is-- a vast series of complex and interconnected systems. A better advocate for the importance of this lens might be Donella Meadows, here's a short quote from her excellent book Thinking in Systems:

Once we see the relationship between structure and behavior, we can begin to understand how systems work, what makes them produce poor results, and how to shift them into better behavior patterns. As our world continues to change rapidly and become more complex, systems thinking will help us manage, adapt, and see the wide range of choices we have before us. It is a way of thinking that gives us the freedom to identify root causes of problems and see new opportunities.

In the wake of a class that left my head spinning (in a good way) with a newborn incremental game (see you are a writer) nestled in the crook of my arm, I began to reimagine my destiny as a game designer. I, having had more experience in storytelling (in Film/TV and Interactive Fiction), had always imagined myself as a narrative designer. Perhaps I found more joy in systems design than narrative design? Perhaps I even felt that the most interesting aspect of games was their ability to bring a system to life-- to allow for players to interact with it.

Over the following summer (2025), I, like many going through transformative personal growth, foolishly listened to a heaping helping of podcasts, one of which is called Script Lock. I think it was Jake Elliot (from the episode with Tim Schafer, Jake Elliot, and Cara Ellison) who said this thing that has stuck with me... but anyways, some-narrative-designer-who-may-or-may-not-be-Jake-Elliot gave the offhand advice that narrative designers should read Donella Meadows' Thinking in Systems and I thought, "WAIT, YES! THAT'S TRUE! THESE TWO THINGS THAT IN MY MIND HAD NOT BEEN CONNECTED ARE ACTUALLY VERY MUCH CONNECTED!"

Look at Tom Francis of Suspicious Developments and Tactical Breach Wizards, Heat Signature , and Gunpoint, all games with deep systems that support and develop the narrative. Look at the games from Strange Scaffold, like Clickolding, I Am Your Beast, or Space Warlord Baby Trading Simulator, games that dive headfirst into strong loops and mechanics that, standalone, tell stories. Ah, I've fallen into the trap of just listing games that I like and I've gotten off track. A quick aside though, I think it is no coincidence that these two stellar developers literally cite sustainability as an important aspect of development that they have paid special mind to. Food for thought.

Here's the thing: I just think that interactive systems are an undeniably crucial part of games. To conclude, I'll revisit a time worn ludonarrative question: "Does every game have to have a story/narrative?" And I would respond, "Well, every game has a system. And every system tells a story. So, yes."

The next big obstacle in my journey was thesis. The journey from the start of thesis to the beginning of JOB-- my current thesis project --was long and winding... But that's a story for next time.

GDC (interlude)

dev blog #2

3/19/26

So, I went to GDC last week.

Of the many thoughts I may have and will likely write about unsolicited... none will compare to the concise and thoughtful post-GDC blog by Meredith Gran. This quote resonates with me (and seemed to resonate with many others):

... GDC took a chunk out of me, too. The expense, the scamminess, the desperation. I have not quite recovered. What I’ve seen makes me want to keep my life small and focused, make work by any means necessary on shoestring budgets and ignore the industry completely. I think for me, for now, that’s how it needs to be. It’s not like the industry has any answers or knows what is next. It’s not like I see myself in the majority of these quickly-vanishing roles. Maybe my small, focused world is all there ever was.

It feels strange and surreal to see so many artists-- including the likes of Meredith and AP Thomson both of whom deservedly won IGF awards --surrounded by the blinding hyper-commercial tech companies who seek to extract, extract, extract.

I had a conversation with two guys, one from Google and one from EA (neither made games but both worked near them). The first thing that I was asked when it was revealed that I was a fledgling game designer was, "How are you leveraging AI to make games?" To which I responded, somewhat flaccidly, "I am not."

Mr. EA then hit me with a metaphor (paraphrasing):

Everyone who is making games is on a lake. Those who are not using AI-- those guys are swimming. The people who are using AI? They're in speed boats.

It's obvious to me how this metaphor is meant to translate: "Sink or swim.". It's a tale as old as time.

But actually, this metaphor is excellent.

  • Speed boating enthusiasts are relying upon a technology that is completely divorced from swimming. Speed boating skills do not translate to swimming skills.
  • The big speed boating companies are actually encouraging people to not learn how to swim and jump straight to speed boating.
  • Sure, speed boating is cheap and fast right now. But will it be that way when you and your speed boating friends are totally reliant upon the technology?
  • Are we thinking about how dangerous this lake will be when there are a ton of speed boats whipping around and no one knows how to swim?
  • Lastly, this lake is beautiful! Why are we rushing around? The water is warm and calm as long as no one is fucking speed boating around! Sure, it's a little scary in the deeper parts but as long as you know how to swim, you'll be just fine.

    • Human achievement is often difficult to quantify but I think everyone can see the difference between someone who swam across the lake and someone who speed boated across the lake. Of course, effort is not the only qualifier but even from a practical perspective-- I would rather be a strong swimmer.

    the beginning

    dev blog #3

    4/15/26

    We (I) are (am) in the homestretch. In only a few weeks I graduate and Thesis concludes. Let's talk about the first semester of Thesis.

    I began Thesis as a part of a large (for Thesis) and abundantly talented group of game designers. Surprisingly, we all also represented fairly different specialties within the various disciplines associated with game development, thusly dodging the messy toe-stepping that can happen in a lot of student projects. Nevertheless, we faced the gargantuan task of "finding a game we all want to make", something that is hard enough when it's your job, harder still when you're looking down the barrel of the-concept-of-Thesis, whatever that is.

    Many told me, "Find a good group who you care about and want to make games with, that's all that matters." Many others told me, "This is a time for you to make a game that is personal to you, that showcases who you are." A few people told me, "Why do you keep talking about this to me? I don't know what you're talking about and I don't feel like I understand the stakes. You keep saying it doesn't really matter what the game is but I feel like it might matter?"

    I felt like I was being pulled in opposite directions. Making a game with people I cared about. And making a game that I really, really cared about. I didn't think that those things were mutually exclusive... I mean, I still don't. But there is some strange toxin in the word "Thesis" that turns you, like some fell magic, into a selfish auteur.

    I thought a lot about this adage:

    If you want to go fast, travel alone. If you want to go far, travel together.

    And though I am the main character of this blog post, I am just a supporting or special guest character in the lives of my friends who I had been working with. Some of them, as it turns out, were experiencing character development of the same flavor. However, due to being more decisive or well-adjusted, those who desired to pursue their own paths in Thesis departed within our first semester (Fall 2025). By the end of the semester we were not 6 but 4. At that time, halfway through our Thesis experience, I decided to come clean about my doubts and we had a big conversation about what we wanted to do moving forward.

    It was then that I decided to go solo.

    So, there I was. Halfway through the biggest project of my time in grad school with nothing to show for it except for an entire semester of learning, brutal introspection, joyful and challenging collaboration with my favorite group of game designers, and having hard conversations about who I am and the games I want to make with the best professors in the world (fact not opinion).

    I guess it wasn't that much of a waste after all.